I questioned uploading this because I thought what if the people who in some way or another contribute to my disfatication, read this?!
‘Is this an indirect dig?’ ‘Is she trying to tell me something without telling me anything at all?’ I can hear all of the questions now.
Well you guys know me! Eventually I decided to upload it anyway! #SorryNotSorry
The first few weeks of this year have been amazing for me! Sorry 🙈 excuse my manners. Happy new year guys! I hope 2018 is a phenomenal year for us all!
For the first time in a while I came into the new year feeling like this year will be my best year yet! But even with this, I couldn’t help but feel a slight hint of dissatisfaction as the first few days went by.
All of a sudden work dissatisfied me. I wanted so much more. More growth, more support, more money! Don’t get me wrong I love my job but there were somethings that just made me question what next?
And then there were friendships. To be clear, I’m am so certain that every person in my inner circle is there for a purpose! I love my friends sooo much
(soppy moment) Having said that, there were the odd few relationships that I enjoyed, saw value in and loved but upon closer evaluation, I realised they left me spiritually and in some cases emotionally dissatisfied.
Can I keep it 100? Well the fact that you’re still reading this means that the answer is yes…
Even ministry dissatisfied me.
My commitment to certain responsibilities at church felt obligationary. And this was by no means the fault of the leadership or the church. This was simply because with dissatisfaction comes disconnection.
So with only a few weeks into the year and all of this dissatisfaction what am I suppose to do? Yup! I was stuck here too.
So in true Sarah fashion, I started to look into why I was so dissatisfied. Everything that left me feeling this way, were all things I loved! I love my job, I love my friends and I love ministry. So the real issue here must be me.
There is nothing wrong with me wanting more. I would like to think of myself as ambitious. But I realised that in the midst of all of my ambition, I lost the ability to appreciate my now and enjoy the process. But being ambitious shouldn’t leave us dissatisfied to the point of being disconnected.The dissatisfaction I felt was also because I was too afraid to say no! I found myself so caught up in pleasing people and not letting people down, that I often let myself down. But that is a story for another day .
Right now there are so many things for me to be grateful for. So many things that I could build on to make better. Feeling dissatisfied is often the beginning of the enemy’s tactics to keep us stagnant. We spend more time thinking of all the things wrong and what could be better that we dont actually make the moves to ensure we can be better. We all know the saying…water can’t remain stagnant. it needs to keep flowing or else it will begin to smell… I don’t know about you but if the choice was move or stink, I’d choose move.
I learnt a few lessons already this year. But the one I will share today is- Never get so caught up in ‘things’. Because one day the very things you love, can be the very things that leave you dissatisfied. Instead love the reason why you do those things. So whenever you start to feel dissatisfied, remind yourself why? If you do not have a why, then find one. And if you can’t find it then maybe you are dissatisfied because that very thing dissatisfying you, has no purpose.
Until next time my loves from a now satisfied Sarah xxx
Photcred: Reni aka one of the many CEO’s of Sarah must live her best life by FORCE 🤣💗