My MIND was in a self-inflicted battle. The cause of this battle, well that is simple; I spent hours, days and weeks rehearsing events over and over again.
I remember loosing my breath and breaking out in a hot sweat. The ability to have peace with my thoughts had become a luxury I once took for granted and right now missed dearly. As my heart rate increased, and my sheets soaked up with the sweat from my perspiring body, it hit me..I am in a battle of the M I N D | B O D Y | S O U L
The Battle without a fight
It started off with my MIND but it was not long before My BODY had fallen victim. I would lose sleep, neglected my business, was making silly mistakes at work and literally felt drained all of the time. In the space of one week I lost 9 lbs and then in the space of two, I put on 11. There are no words to describe what it feels like to once have control and then just watch it slowly slip away. At that moment in time I felt that all of the control I ever had, had now gone. I was in a battle and I was loosing!
When you get to this place, there really is not much that anyone can say because there was an aching in my SOUL.
Many people aren’t 100% sure what the SOUL is. Here is a scripture taken from the bible that tells us how the soul was formed.
”The Lord God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living soul” Genesis 2:7
So what does it mean? For me the soul is the
inner life of actual person-hood.
When my MIND was going through what it was going through and then my BODY was shutting down, it was my SOUL that was truly troubled. Our soul is the home to our emotions, it is where our responses to life, good or bad are harbored. So you see the soul is powerful! When my soul was not right, everything else began to crumble.
Time to cheat on my flesh and HEAD TO THE LIGHT….
situations can get us so bad that we run far FAR away from people, loved ones….the church. But we have a responsibility to run towards the light in the mist of our darkness. That is not a job someone else can do. It is not the role of your ‘consoling’ friend or your pastor but for you.
You see many people fail the battle because they neglect their spirit. For me, the spirit is
The realm where I can relate with God and God with me.
You know I was once told that our MIND is powered by the thoughts we feed it. When the revelation of those words sank in I had to believe that there is STRENGTH in GOD.
I felt so weak… too weak but then I prayed. I asked God to strengthen me forgetting that he is my strength. So at the same time I was asking God to come in and take over I was also holding on so tightly to all things angry! It felt so good to the flesh to be angry. I thought I could have them both.
”All those years” I said, ”all of that love, time, energy and what for? A departure so easy, to easy”…
Bitterness is so detrimental to our spirits because it is toxic to our progress! God wants us to be better.
The only way I could beat the devil at this game was to pray for God to heal my soul and touch my heart! I prayed without ceasing because I had no choice! It became a matter of life and death. I had to eradicate my negative words and read Gods word! There is no magic potion to this. So sorry if you were expecting more. I thought I was living the truth by responding to my pain the way the world says I should. But although my body and mind temporarily felt good, it started to crumble because my soul was shattered!
Listen life happens, I know that too well, but you have to be committed to the process in order for the soul to be healthy and you mind and body to be free. I once heard that good things don’t come easily. You can catch a disease but you can’t catch good health; good health takes commitment.
I want to encourage you to believe. One day I will share my full testimony but until then I want you to see something…Paul and Silas praised in the furnace, Hannah prayed when she had no child, Stephen sang when he was being stoned….Thier soul’s could have chosen to mourn but instead they purposely cheated on their flesh and chose to run towards the light.
Next week I am writing a Blog titled 7 ways to smile through it. Make sure you tune in and see 7 ways that got me through a tough period in my life.
Until the next post Enjoy your week all!
THANK YOU FOR READING!
And Remember keep running!
My 5 truths
I am fearfully and wonderfully made
I am the apple of God’s eye
My latter will be greater than my former
All things work together for my good
You are more than a conqueror.